Popcorn for a Brain

Back when I used to read reviews of my book (and quickly learned that there was nothing for me to gain by reading reviews of my book) I remember some reviewer musing about whether I had ADHD (based, I’m presuming, on my writing style or voice).

During these intervening years, we learned that one of my sons does, indeed, have ADHD. He’s not particularly hyperactive anymore. He’s outgrown much of that. When he was younger that translated mostly into “extremely fidgety without being disruptive.”

We decided as a family not to pursue medication because (a) he wasn’t disruptive and (b) his grades were fine. In other words, the condition wasn’t negatively impacting his life enough to warrant potential side effects. Every couple of years we review this decision. He will be an adult soon and make this decision for himself.

In the meantime, I dug into all of the “natural” ways to deal with ADHD: Regular cardiovascular exercise. Organizing for function rather than aesthetics. Pursuing minimalism (the less stuff you have, the less stuff you have to put away!)

And the more I did for him, the more I thought, “Damn it, this applies to me, too.” I suppose, in the future, I should look up that reviewer and start reading her reviews at least, because she was pretty darned astute.

As I tried to explain to a bunch of whippersnapper teachers one year, most people have Miss Moneypenny in their brain, telling them: “You need to add milk to the grocery list. You placed your keys on the hook by the door.” My son and I, however, have poor executive function. We have Carol Burnett’s Mrs. Huh-Wiggins running the show. She puts empty milk cartons back in the fridge and puts the keys under a different couch cushion every single day. (Those teachers were young. They had no idea who Mrs. Huh-Wiggins was. And they only knew about Moneypenny thanks to Daniel Craig. Sheesh!)

And lately? I don’t even have Mrs. H-W. As a result (I’m positive) of slacking off on daily morning cardio (because its COLD, dammit!) I have popcorn for a brain instead. Milk? Hah. We’re pouring sauerkraut over our wheaties today.

I’m going to get off my duff now, plug in my earbuds, turn on my fitness app, tie my left shoe and–oh, wait! Are those my keys under the piano?