The Older I Get, The Cooler I Become
I’ll be the first to admit, I wasn’t one of the cool kids in high school. Or college. Or early adulthood. Or middle adulthood. But, as I get older, I care less about how people view me or the things I do, and focus more on who I want to be and what I want to do. The result? I’ve become cool.
I write romance novels–sometimes steamy ones–and I’m proud to see my name stamped on the front of them. The sex scenes may raise some eyebrows,or make some people wonder how I learned all that stuff, but that’s okay. Sex is an important part of romance. If the scene calls for it, I’m cool with it .
Years ago, I had a convertible. I loved it. It was only a two-seater and not very practical, so I gave it up for a more sensible car … and I’ve regretted it ever since. I miss zipping down the highway with the sun in my face and the wind whipping my hair. I miss the balmy nights when the moon and stars were spread across my vision, and I felt like I was part of it all. So I’m starting to look at convertibles again. People may think I’m too old for it, but I don’t care, ’cause I’m cool with it.
I take Zumba classes. I’ve always loved to dance, and I needs to exercise, so Zumba fits needs and wants . In those classes, I’ve learned to enjoy a lot of today’s musical artists that I never would have listened to–Pink, Maroon 5, Train, and Lady Gaga to name a few. It’s loosened me up on the dance floor where I used to stand in one place and sort of shift my feet back and forth to the beat. N,ow I just let it go. I bump and grind and shimmy until I have to stop and catch my breath, then I go back in for another round. It may raise a few eyebrows, but I’m cool with it.
Last weekend, my husband and I were in an art gallery, and a print caught our interest. It was an image from the back of an empty church with an old woman walking down the aisle toward the front. I was taken by it. So was DH. When we got close enough to see the title, it read: Eleanor. As Beatle fans, we were instantly hooked, couldn’t leave without it, and now the homage to Eleanor Rigby hangs on our bedroom wall. Years ago, we would have talked ourselves out of it. Too expensive. It doesn’t look like typical bedroom art, yada, yada, yada. But we’re not typical any more. We’re just us … and we’re cool with it.
A lot of people out there never get to be the cool kids. They spend their whole lives in pursuit of someone else’s praise or validity. I’m no longer one of those people. I’ve learned to be cool … before I get cold.
How about you? What cool thing have you done lately just because you can?
Feb 11, 2013 @ 05:58:29
Oh Pam, what a wonderful post! I love the benefits of old age that you mentioned — and they were a surprise to me, since no one told me about them!
The contentment I’m feeling now with my life was worth all the pain and angst along the way to getting here!
I told someone the other day that every year I’m enjoying life more…if this keeps up, I’m going to die giggling!
So glad it’s not just me.
Feb 11, 2013 @ 06:42:15
It’s a sisterhood we earn our way into, Laura. Welcome! The saying “Life is Good” is our motto:-)
Feb 11, 2013 @ 06:32:40
If you guys could have seen Pam on the dance floor last Friday, you’d KNOW she really lets go when dancing! I’m not sure she even had a partner out there!
And hell….I’m going backward. I was cool in junior high. I was cool in high school. College was U of Arkansas, so I was a cog in the wheel. I don’t think I’m cool anymore.
But as I’ve gotten older, I care less what people think of me. I’m not sure that makes me cool. I think it makes me cranky! LOL
Feb 11, 2013 @ 06:43:54
Cyndi, when you don’t care that you’re cranky, you’re cool! LOL! That’s the beauty of it!
And, no, I didn’t have a partner:-)
Feb 11, 2013 @ 09:18:43
Great post, Pamela. Being “cool with it” is definitely one of the things I’m enjoying about getting older. I still struggle with concern over what others will think sometimes, but less and less every year.
As a vegan who writes sexy romances, doesn’t drink wine, and won’t badmouth her husband, I’ve had to get over it. Somehow, I think my 14-yo who dyes his hair green and rides a unicycle already has it figured out.
Gwen Hernandez recently posted..Fitting it all in
Feb 11, 2013 @ 13:13:23
I’ve seen pictures of your son on FB, Gwen. I think you’re right about him!
Feb 11, 2013 @ 09:47:32
Hah. I was just thinking the same thing Saturday. We went to a rodeo and as I was getting dressed I thought, “Damn it’s cool that I’m old and don’t have to care about these five winter pounds and how my butt looks in these jeans.” Because face it. The boys ain’t lookin’ at me. Except one, and that’s super cool with me.
Kari Lynn Dell recently posted..When the Lights Went Out
Feb 11, 2013 @ 13:14:49
Yes, Kari! I think the same thing! I go to the pool, and who cares how I look in a swimsuit? It’s ver freeing … and very cool
Feb 11, 2013 @ 15:09:37
Fantastic post, Pam! I’m very envious of you.
I was never cool. I’m still not. But somewhere along the line, I became comfortable with who I am. Most importantly, I’ve been able to impart the insight that came with it to my kids, and they reached that point far earlier than I did. I feel better about that than my inability to stop caring how I look in a bathing suit. (For the record? ABSOLUTELY HORRENDOUS.)
Natalie J. Damschroder recently posted..Setting a Bad Example
Feb 11, 2013 @ 16:09:03
You’re just not old enough yet, Natalie:-) I’m speaking as the senior member of the group:-D Glad you found your cool early (and that’s what it is) and glad you were able to impart it to your kids.
Feb 11, 2013 @ 15:45:40
Pamela, what a great post. I wouldn’t want to go back into the past, would you? I wouldn’t trade places with any of the cool kids. I’ve come into my own. And you obviously have, too. Regards to Eleanor! Whatever floats your boat!
Donnell recently posted..Help! I’ve Lost My Noodle
Feb 11, 2013 @ 16:10:19
Not in a million years, Donnell! I like the skin I’m in now–wrinkles and all:-)
Feb 11, 2013 @ 16:34:32
I don’t know, I feel puh-lenty old! LOL Thanks, Pam!
Natalie J. Damschroder recently posted..Setting a Bad Example
Feb 11, 2013 @ 16:41:18
Well, I always knew you were cool.
And the girl is not afraid to boogie!!
Feb 11, 2013 @ 17:24:55
I think it was you young ‘uns that taught me the moves:-) Most people my age are just afraid to try them! (((hugs)))
Feb 11, 2013 @ 17:02:32
Pamela, I always thought you were cool, every since I met you in H.S. We’re all cool in our own peculiar was, lol Joey
Feb 11, 2013 @ 17:27:53
You said it, Joey! Finding our “cool” is the best part of getting older. Well, ONE of the best parts. As I recall, you were pretty cool yourself in HS. And now that you read romance novels, you are a Renaissance Man in my eyes–that’s the ultimate cool:-)
Feb 11, 2013 @ 21:26:56
Loved this post, Pam!! I wasn’t one of the cool kids either. LOL I’ve always liked to just blend in to the crowd and now that I’m older, I know that’s perfectly okay. I’m happy with the woman I’ve become.
Melissa Ohnoutka recently posted..Good-bye FEAR
Feb 12, 2013 @ 07:41:32
Happy in the skin you’re in, Melissa–you’ve learned the secret of being cool! Congrats
Feb 13, 2013 @ 10:25:46
Oh, I was never one of the cool kids either Pam! Growing up in a military family I was really out of my league when my family ended up in a small New England town when my father retired. I was surrounded by kids who had been together since birth and if they’d traveled to Boston or Disney World they had been somewhere. There I was…born in Taiwan and fresh from living two years in Turkey…yeah, very uncool.
It took alot of years for me to feel good inside my own skin but I’m loving it now! I’ve envied my daughter, who at age of 21, is already there and it makes me so proud when she tells me she’s gotten that from watching me!
Feb 14, 2013 @ 15:30:50
What a wonderful compliment to both you and your daughter! And, see, I would have thought you to be the ultimate cool person in HS since you’d had all those experiences.
It’s all in the perspective:-)
Thanks for stopping by!